Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Cast System

The weekend of ice and elevation did absolutely nothing for my injured foot. My foot doctor, who is more than a little creepy and who tends to absently stroke my foot while he's talking to me, doesn't know if it's broken or sprained. But he figured a sure fire way to solve either problem was to slap a cast on me.

That's right, a cast.

It could be worse. It could be one of those big, bulky casts that goes up to my knee. I got lucky--mine is a soft cast that only comes up to my lower calf. Basically, it's a thick bunch of bandages wrapped tightly around my foot. It's relatively unobtrusive, but incredibly itchy on the inside. And in order to walk the city streets in my obtrusive and itchy soft cast, Dr. Strange also gave me a surgical shoe. What is a surgical shoe, you ask? Well, it's huge and black and has lots of velcro straps, and besides the fake Doc Martens I used to wear in high school, it's pretty much the most unattractive thing I've ever put on my foot.

Then there's the smell.

On a good day, a day without a soft cast or excessive exercise or perspiration, my feet stink. I inherited this attractive trait from my dear old Nonni (my Italian grandmother). If my foot even gets near a shoe, it starts to stink. And once my foot has been in a shoe--watch out! spiceboy is pretty good about dealing with the stench, but there have been a couple of nights when it was so bad that he actually demanded that I wash my feet before I got into bed. Do you understand why he proposed to me? I sure don't.

Now, if the foot stench is awful on a good day, imagine what it's like when you throw in a soft cast and a surgical shoe. That's right, it's baaaaaaad. Now, imagine the smelly foot/cast combo after you accidentally get the cast wet in the shower b/c you dropped the soap and when you leaned over to pick it up water seeped through the trash bag you had electrical-taped to your calf in order to protect your foot.

Now, that's smelly.


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