Monday, May 19, 2008

Bed Restlessness

How is it possible, with all of modern medical technology available to us, that we haven’t found an alternative to the rather Victorian prescription of bed rest?

We can monitor the baby’s heartbeat and brain activity and kidney function. We can predict whether or not I will go into labor within the next two weeks (I won’t, thank goodness). We can take 3D pictures of Spicebaby inside my uterus, pictures so clear that we can already tell that she has Spiceboy's adorable nose.

Yet we can’t come up with a better solution for my abrupted placenta than: Stay in bed!

I have to stay in bed. Until JULY.

I cannot go to the office. I cannot walk Betty around the block. I cannot even stand up to make chocolate chip cookies.

No, I’m not kidding.

Yes, I know it will all be worth it in the end.

Yes, I know it's for a good cause--that good cause is kicking me in the ribs at this very moment.

But bed rest? It kinda sucks.

So I might be a little crankier than usual around here until around July 4th, which is when I hit my 34th week of pregnancy. At that time, I will unleash my pregnant belly on the streets of Manhattan once again!

I will buy flowers at the greenmarket! I will wait in a ridiculously long line for a cheeseburger at the Shake Shack! I will waddle down to the Lower East Side for some rosemary gelato, which I will share with the lovely Spiceboy, who deserves a medal of honor for his valor during this pregnancy.

I am already counting down the days...